Powerless
by nancystagerat
Summary: mangafic based on vol. 9. Companion to The Other Side of the Gun, Roy's POV. He can't stand feeling this powerless. Royai if you squint reeeealy hard


**Powerless**

I dialed the phone. Call me a softie, call me a worrier, but…I needed to know. I couldn't just sit there and wait for her to check in.

"Hey, Elizabeth! How are you?" To tell the truth, I was thankful the call connected. That'd been one of our biggest concerns, getting through to each other from opposite sides of the city. Fuery's pseudo-phone line had never been tested, so in my mind, anyway, it was a sort of miracle that the slipshod thing worked at all. I made a mental note to commend him on that; he'd managed to hack into a secure military line without much of a problem.

"Oh, hello, Roy." The lieutenant sounded taken aback; I'd deviated a bit from the plan. "Thanks for calling, Are you still at work?"

"Uh-huh, but I really wanted to hear your voice." It wasn't a lie. She couldn't honestly expect me to sit in my office like a good little boy and hover over the phone, salivating for the smallest drop of news. Besides, I knew she wouldn't call in unless it was an emergency. And Hawkeye's definition of "emergency" was a lot narrower than mine. She could've been coughing up blood and barely conscious and still wouldn't have called it an "emergency". Me, I get a paper cut and I'm sending her out on a band-aid run.

And…I _did_ need to hear her, not just to set my mind at ease.

"Oh, aren't you slick." Her voice oozed sarcasm; guess she didn't much appreciate the 'I needed to hear you' comment. She was all business, as per usual. "But if you slack off too much, won't that scary assistant of yours be mad at you?"

Hardy har har. My "scary assistant" was probably mad enough at me just for calling her. "Don't worry. She's off today." She didn't reply. "I got so much work done this week, I told her to take the day off."

"That's nice of you." Ever the cynic, she was, her dry voice sandpaper against my skin. I couldn't stand talking to her like this. I almost wished I was where she was, having her call to me from behind a desk. It was safer that way…for _both_ of us.

_:She's more than capable, you moron. Stop worrying about her; she's a big girl. Riza can take care of herself.:_ I had to beat the worry back from my brain. The lieutenant knew better than to leave herself in a position where she could get hurt; that much I knew. She didn't need me hanging over her shoulder.

"I haven't had a moment's rest since I came to Central, so I've been thinking about taking some time off." Translation: get me the hell away from this desk! I couldn't take it; it felt like my insides were eating themselves, my stomach twisted so often.

"Oh, are you going somewhere?" She sounded so nonchalant, like all this was nothing to her. Like I sent her to chase down escaped criminals while watching Havoc and Falman's backs everyday. Meanwhile, there I was chomping at the bit to get down there. I needed to know what was happening, and at the same time I prayed that nothing would.

"Lately I've been itching to go fishing. Would you like to come?"

"No, but thank you, though." I heard the warning in her voice. "I can't stomach the thought of watching them die out of water."

She was on to me. "Okay, I'll drop by your shop tomorrow, then. Do you want me to bring you anything?"

"Oh my, thank you! Could you bring something for Kate, too?" I hadn't been expecting that kind of a response. What did she want me to do? Something about Fuery…"That girl's been working so hard lately…"

All of a sudden a loud rattle washed into my ears; something was happening. Someone –or some_thing_- had shown up. "Oh, excuse me for a moment, Roy," she said. "Kate! We have a customer!"

My hand tightened around the receiver, jaw clenched so hard it hurt. _:Dammit, Hawkeye, what the hell is going on: _

I heard the click as Fuery connected with the line. "Yes, ma'am."

"Could you call Jacqueline for me?" So she needed Havoc. They'd found their target. And if I didn't know better I could've sworn she sounded nervous. I fought to keep my expression relaxed; I couldn't afford someone looking in on me in some kind of nerve-induced rage. I was supposed to be talking to my "girlfriend", after all, not orchestrating some sort of covert operation that could have us all killed for treason or at the very least expelled from the military. If I got caught, so did they.

Like I said, I couldn't afford to look suspicious.

"Jacqueline?" Fuery said, clicking to connect us with Havoc's headset. "You have a _customer_."

"Affermative." Havoc sounded businesslike, not in the least concerned about chasing down whatever had broken into Falman and Barry the Chopper's hideout. I heard him load his pistol and his line went dead.

Hawkeye said nothing as the clamor in the alley grew louder, so loud I could've sworn I heard shouting. Sounded like Havoc found what he was looking for. I waited for the lieutenant to say something. I needed to know what was happening. I needed to hear her voice.

Gunshots rang out. It took every ounce of self control not to lurch out of my chair. Suspenseful was an understatement. I wanted to scream, to order her to tell me what in the seven hells was going on! Something big had to be making all that noise...

And all I could do was wait. Powerless…

Over the din someone shouted for the Lieutenant; my chest tightened at the sound as another shot exploded in my ear – Hawkeye must've fired.

Inhuman shrieks of pain rattled into the phone, groaning like some sort of animal. I couldn't take it anymore. "Elizabeth? I heard a loud noise. What happened?" It would've been a miracle if I'd managed to keep my voice level. My stomach was twisting; for the first time in a while, I was truly afraid.

"Nothing to worry about," she said grimly, a barely discernable waver threading itself through her words. Cold relief washed through my veins; she was fine for now. "The customer was being mean to Jacqueline so I lad to _slap_ him." I could hear her reload the rifle. The moans of the creature she'd shot still rang in my ears.

"You're as strict as ever, Elizabeth." I tried to sound unfazed, probably failing miserably. "Your shop seems busy. Should I hang up?"

"That's all right." Her words were sharp, breath too quick for her to hide her nerves. I could tell she was anxious. "You seem busy, too."

"Not really." A bleak laugh wound its way around my words. "I can take it easy thanks to my capable subordinate." _:Take it easy, my ass…: _I would've killed to be anywhere but here, anywhere but stuck behind this desk, anything but helpless. The shouting in the background elevated. "What's going on?"

"…it looks like an argument…She's having trouble with the customer."

"Some customers just don't appreciate good service."

"Tell me about it…" Her words clipped short; I could practically see her tense up. I didn't like the sound of things…

"Uh-oh," she said, curt words that made my stomach clench. "I'll have to call you back."

My blood ran cold.

"_One of my regulars is here_."

The urgency in her voice made my whole body seize up. There were more gunshots, the sickening sound of bullets connecting with flesh – the blood sang in my ears, pumping so loudly I only distantly heard the guttural laughter rumbling in the receiver.

"What's wrong? Elizabeth!" It took everything I had to keep from shouting. I couldn't afford to raise suspicion, couldn't afford to jeopardize her any more than she was…but I couldn't help myself.

"Hey! Pick up! **_Elizabeth!_**"

No answer.

I slammed down the phone.

I couldn't let her die. Not like Hughes… She was all I had left.


End file.
